She Writes An Awesome Rebuttal Post After Being Shamed Wearing This…

Written by Brynne Huffman

Ok here goes. Read this. It’s long. I don’t care. I don’t want sympathy. I don’t want compliments. I want action. Read it.

Women. Please, I beg of you PLEASE do not tear each other down. There is so much hate in the world right now. Rape culture. Hating Islam. Hating LGBTQ. No more hate.

Today I put on a pair of mid-thigh denim shorts, a flowy white blouse, flip flops and left the house to run a couple errands.

Let me pause for a moment to tell you it took some courage to both purchase and wear said shorts because my legs, while tan from swimming and muscular from dancing, are (1) not where I would like them to be and (2) are not up traditional beauty standards (read: Photoshopped) because cellulite.

My second errand of the morning was a drop off at the UPS store. I stood in line between two women. Woman #1 in front of me was about sixty. As I took my place in line behind her, she smiled and complimented me on my tan and my hair. We chitchatted about the weather and children until it was her turn at the counter.

It the spirit of paying it forward, I turned to Woman #2 behind me and smiled. Woman #2 was probably about 30-35, very attractive, about a size 8, wearing a shirt that says “COEXIST”.

She says: “Your hair really is amazing. ::cocks head to side:: “You should probably rethink the shorts though.”

Yeah. Read that again.

My face instantly flushes, not out of embarrassment but anger. No, not anger. Rage. This as my head slowly tilts to the side. If you’ve seen me really angry you know what I mean.

My fists clenched up. I know this because I felt my nails digging into my palms. So many things ran through my head. Because I don’t have time to get arrested today, what came out was this:

“You should probably rethink your shirt.”

I turned around and ignored her until I left the store. I wanted to say more but was afraid, of all things, that I would start crying. All I wanted to do was go home and change my clothes. And THAT made me angry.

Gender doesn’t matter.
Race doesn’t matter.
Religion doesn’t matter.
Sexual orientation doesn’t matter.

But fat?
Apparently fat matters.

And I’ll go a step further and say it especially seems to matter as an actress. Matter more than talent. Than attitude. Than pretty much anything else. Because fat girls are not believable heroines, ingenues, or objects of sexual desire. But that’s a whole other post.

Listen, people.

Especially women.

Plus sized doesn’t necessarily mean unhealthy.
Plus sized doesn’t necessarily mean lazy.
Plus sized doesn’t mean ugly or undesirable or untalented or uncoordinated or LESS. THAN. HUMAN.

You might have an issue with my body. I don’t. And I’ve worked very hard past judgmental family and friends, past divorce, past depression to NOT have an issue with my body.

Women. Do not tear each other down.

Celebrate each other.

Every day.bryn

Posted on June 30, 2016, in Reflections. Bookmark the permalink. 14 Comments.

  1. I think the shorts look fab!!! 🙌🏼 She was probably jealous of the tan and clearly has no internal monologue! X

  2. Your beautiful. ❤❤

  3. Fat NO! The social constructs around body image should be long over by now and no-one has the right to undermine anyone else’s self esteem by being judgemental. You’re gorgeous, hold your head high and wear whatever you like!

  4. I just want to say first of all,,You ARE BEAUTIFUL!!!!! I the hate all the time from women…I am slim and tall, nothing special…but women are always being snide with me. It is to the point that I sometimes fear women….especially in the work place as they have thrown me under the bus more times than I can count. Just know that any woman, any person who degrades another is projecting their own ISSUES onto others. Sadly many are toxic and I believe it is mainly because out society pits women against eachother, but WE ARE ALL RESPONSIBLE to deal with our issues….IGNORE THESE FOOLISH WOMEN…easier said than done…I know…but MORE IMPORTANTLY…KNOW YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL AND MORE SO ON THE INSIDE WHERE IT COUNTS IF YOU ARE UPLIFTING OTHERS….THIS IS THE REAL BEAUTY ALL OF US NEED TO STRIVE FOR. But you have both! So be you…BE YOU TIFUL!!!! Bless you!

  5. You are beautiful and she was probably jealous!

  6. Yeah for you! You look great!

  7. While I do appreciate someone pointing out if I am wearing something that isn’t particularly flattering (regardless of size), that coexist woman was way off. Those shorts are cute. Actually the whole outfit is super cute and very flattering.

  8. You’re beautiful! Keep living life as you should for you and your family! God bless!

  9. haters are gonna’ hate, and unfortunately, little girls start about 2nd grade and continue comparing & judging into adulthood! I have 5 sisters… I know. Raise your girls to respect & accept ALL types of people. Bias will never leave mankind… I’m guilty of not caring for hefty/fat/big/overweight people. But to say it to someone’s face is utterly RUDE!

  10. I love the shirt and you look just fine. I do have a question though. The women who made what you took as a snarky comment about your weight was standing in line behind you, correct? Your shirt is sheer and your shorts appear to be of the low waisted variety, so is it possible that from the back she could see the top crack of your bottom through your shirt? So perhaps her comment had nothing at all to do with your body/weight and everything to do with the unintentional reveal due to the cut of the shorts? Perhaps she was just trying to give you a discreet heads up? At my job we ladies are always looking out for each others bottoms. We do a lot of bending, stretching and squatting, so our pants tend to slide down and yeah, there is the butt crack for the whole world to see! A “Crack Alert!” advisement from another female employee is quite common and very appreciated. Not trying to defend her as she may have just been a snarky snot. Just saying that perhaps she may have actually been trying to protect your backside without actually saying “Your butt crack is hanging out!”

  11. You have beautiful hair… and skin, and energy, and great style, and, more than likely, a million other things. That’s where the focus stays healthy and positive. People say all sorts of things, often times with ignorance, insensativitie, or simple discomfort. I like to think that women (people) are doing their best, even when it doesn’t feel like it. That’s about them, not you… ALWAYS. Sometimes being insensitive IS someone’s best.
    When you are committed to believing in yourself, whatever that means to you, others comments won’t really shake you. Trying to change others by emulating them is not much of a workable solution either and I can assure you, it will be an endless endeavor but… if you truly want to get rid of something, be true to and emulate what you want in the world. BE the love, BE the compassion, BE the joy, BE the thoughtful person in the room, BE the person who values honesty and integrity, BE the intelligence, BE the great hair, just be wholly committed and your perspective will help change the world.
    Thank you for your post!

  12. You are a beautiful woman…a beautiful human being! Inside and out. You are wonderfully made and you are enough. ❤

  13. I am 65 years old and if I haven’t learned anything it is this ” No matter how tall or short you are, skinny or fat, colour of your hair, length and curls you have, weather you wear makeup or not, pretty or not, how you dress? ” They will always find something wrong with you, but really, if you feel good and like what you see in the mirror that is all that matters. What you look like and what you wear doesn’t matter. It is what is in your heart, no one can see that. You should just smile and say, ” Oh but these are so comfortable and I don’t have to pour myself into them. ” ” I love them ” Don’t stoop to her level. You are you. Full of love. And well it could have been your PJ’s. You are Beautiful.

  14. Hi!

    I’ve found a couple of interesting articles and wanted to know what you think about them, please take a look here http://www.lma.hu/consultant.php?cecf

    Looking forward, dolphinhix

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